


Savior of the Fallen

by merbler



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Fix-It, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Most relationships can be read as romantic OR platonic, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Some Humor, Way More Tags To Be Added, depends on what you ship really, for a couple chapters at least, sorry too many tags, still more tags coming up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-05-20 08:19:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14890944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merbler/pseuds/merbler
Summary: unfinished/discontinued (most likely forever, sorry)AVENGERS- INFINITY WAR SPOILERS!Everything Loki does has a reason. Keeping the Tesseract within the vaults of Asgard was no different. With the years he had as king, Loki had a chance to experiment with the space stone and a forgotten relic- the Casket of Ancient Winters. Loki was always aware destiny would one day arrive, but he refused to submit as a pawn to Thanos once again.(Read the notes please!)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is an eventual fix-it fic with a bunch of canon divergence, angst, greif, etc. i hope you enjoy!
> 
> Updates are slow and unpredictable, but this is NOT abandoned! sorry for the wait <3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki had told his brother "I'm here." Thor should have known not to trust the Liesmith's words. As the empty ship exploded around him, Thor could do nothing but cradle the cold body in his arms, and prepare to die a fiery death beside Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! welcome to this story.  
> i've had this planned for a while, only a few days after i saw infinity war for the second time. i dont have a consistent updating schedule yet but i do have a plot and multiple arcs for this fic!  
> i hope you enjoy :)

Loki ran. He could feel his lungs heaving in his chest, not allowing himself to stop and catch his breath. His strides were long and frantic as he stumbled over bodies and rounded corners without looking. 

This was his mistake, as he turned one corner into a familar, bloodstained hallway with flickering lights. Loki crashed straight into Valkyrie, who was going at the same speed. 

They both jumped backwards at the collision, weapons poised before their brains caught up and realized there was no current threat.

"Damn you, Loki!" She snapped. "Running away from the danger, leaving Thor to die! Why am I not surprised?"

"Quiet you drunken fool!" Loki nearly shouted, angered at the accusation. But his voice was raised more from the urgency of their situation.

"Listen to me," He continued. "We don't have much time. I salvaged some escape pods, you need to leave here immediately," Loki said hastily.

"What the hell? Don't bullshit me, where are you gonna end up when the ship explodes?! What, you think you can survive open space without a ship? You may be a freaking Frost Giant but-"

He scoffed, cutting her off. "I'm honored, but save your concern." Sarcasm dripped from his tone as he tried to drive her attention away from his inevitable fate.  

"You'll die, idiot." 

"I'm aware. But you may not, so you need to leave now," Loki hissed, trying to shove Valkyrie away from the fight. 

"I'm not leaving the survivors, we just saved them from Hela!" She snapped, pushing his arms away. "I'm supposed to defend the people, not run to save my own skin. Not again-"

"There will be no people left to defend if you don't leave!" Loki retorted, shaking his head. "We managed to get the few survivors onboard escape pods. You need to lead them out, take them to safety. Go back to Sakaar, even! Just do not return to Earth, he's going there next." 

Valkyrie let out an angry groan and punched a wall, denting the metal. "Why don't you take them?!" She demanded.

"I have to stay. I have to fight Thanos," His voice shook and he turned away from her. "Please, he's going to kill them all. Don't let Ragnarok be in vain. Don't let our deaths," Loki's voice faltered, "be in vain. Go, now."

Valkyrie hesitated, but she looked around at the bloodstained, wrecked hallway and felt the ship give another worrying rumble. "Fine," The woman huffed, sheathing her weapon. He nodded, his expression screaming a silent thank you. They turned and began to go seperate ways. She paused. "Hey, Lackey?"

Loki stopped and turned back around, raising an eyebrow.

"Do what you do best. Survive."

"You as well, Brunnhilde, you're the last Valkyrie, Asgard needs you."

 

* * *

  

Thor fought in his restraints, rage fueling his struggles. He was powerless to stop the Mad Titan from slaughtering the last of his people. 

His friend and mentor, Heimdall, had given his last strength to save Banner, and paid with his life. The gatekeeper's golden eyes were dull and lifeless, the sight burning itself into Thor's head.

He tried to yell out when he saw Loki reappear. Thor again felt betrayed and angered at his brother, but the emotions lessened, fear seeping into the cracks.

When they had escaped Ragnarok, a strong hope bloomed in Thor's chest. Loki had come back, chosen Asgard, risked his life and saved their people. Thor had assumed he would leave, return to Sakaar perhaps, and hand over the mantle of king without even a farewell speech. Thor found himself to be wrong as Loki's form proved to be solid. 

"I'm here," He had said, a sincere smile on his face. Thor believed him, crossing the room in two strides and capturing his brother in a long overdue hug. 

Things were left unsaid, of course. They had a kingdom of refugees to run. Heimdall could have kept them at bay, but the sons of Odin did not waste time. 

Now, Thor desired nothing more than to go back to a mere few hours ago. When the ship had been taveling towards Earth, hopeful and brave. Loki had been hesitant, well aware of his former actions on Migard. Thor had taken that in a good way, noting the slight change in morals. 

He scoffed inwardly at his niave hopes. Loki was siding with Thanos now. Pledging his service, providing him with the Tessaract, offering to return to Earth on a mission in his quest for power. That was, until he noticed the glimmer in his eye, and the elegant dagger manifest behind his back. 

Thor's eye grew wide as Loki's arm was trapped in an instant, his blade centimeters away from slashing Thanos' throat. Tremors began to wrack the trickster's form as he strained against the hold of the space gem. 

Then the gauntlet slowly closed around Loki's throat. Thor watched in horror as Thanos lifted him off the ground. Loki struggled and grasped at the armor-clad arm, gasping for air as his legs dangled uselessly beneath him. 

His resistance grew weaker as the oxygen slowly drained from his lungs. With the voice he had left, Loki choked out his last words, his eyes bloodshot from the lack of air. "You... Will never.. be a God..." 

A crack rang out in the silence. Loki's limbs went limp and his head lolled to the side. Thor screamed. His shoulders heaved as Thanos took his time, being sure to show off Loki's body dangling from his hand, as he walked over to Thor's metal confinements. He dropped Loki as if he was nothing, a broken thing with no more use to him. 

His eyes were still open, Thor realized. But he could see they were dead, glassy, empty. Loki's face was nearly blue and his whole body was limp. Thor hated the sight but found he couldn't tear his gaze away. 

People were speaking, but they were miles away. Thor couldn't see anything besides the bodies of the fallen, Loki splayed out right in front of him as a mockery. A reminder of his failure. 

The restraints fell away as Thanos and the Black Order vanished. The ship crumbled around him, but Thor only fell forward and crawled towards Loki. 

Exhaustion weighed heavy on his bones as Thor buried his face against Loki's shoulder, a hand resting on his chest. He let his greif overtake him, bury him, as he tried to hold onto his brother in the chaos of the wreckage. 

His last words crossed his mind. "You really are the worst, brother," was the last thing he had ever said to him. Now Loki was dead, Thor's brother and friend since the very start, and he couldn't speak to him ever again.

The importance of his brother's Silvertongue dawned on Thor. He realized Loki's words were truly meant for him to hear, not Thanos. Loki had pledged his undying fidelity to him, then  _why_ was he dead? Questions charged through his head, swirling through shock and loss.

Thor tried to say something, anything. "Loki," He managed, the quiet word being swallowed up by the roar of the flames. Thor's consciousness soon followed. He felt the burning fire at his skin suddenly become the cold, harsh pressure of nothingness. 

The sun would not shine on them in the empty depths of space. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the weird imbalance with the dialogue-heavy scene and then a scene with barely any dialogue!  
> this was mostly a prolouge chapter but it has a bit of a missing scene from the actual movie that explains some things in the future of this fic. 
> 
> let me know what you think so far in the comments!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dying was not a new sensation to Loki. This trip, however, went a bit different than usual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO SORRY this is so late!!! three months late shdhshdhdhdhd
> 
> but i hope this long-ish chapter makes up for it?? please read the notes at the end 
> 
> special thanks to one of my friends for being an awesome beta reader!! :)

The cold was numbing, reaching into the very center of his being, cutting off his limbs and freezing his chest. He was floating, no ground beneath him, the atmosphere lacking gravity around him. Loki slowly opened his eyes, trying to sway upright by kicking out with his legs. His feet touched nothing, leaving him suspended and off balance.

The vast expanse of space was dulled around him. Galaxies and stars burned in the distance, their image faded and blurred. Loki knew it was merely a conjuration of his unconscious mind. He felt no pulse in his wrist, no breath in his lungs- The trickster was nearly gone, trapped between the worlds of the living and the dead.

"This is new," He murmured, glancing around at his surroundings. Off in the distance, a star shone brighter than the others. To his left, a blast of purple light floated faintly in the distance. "Thor," He whispered, trying to reach out with his magic. Loki couldn't sense him, let alone offer a spell of protection. "Be safe, brother," The god sighed.

Light touched his face and he looked up in confusion. The star Loki dismissed had expanded in both size and brightness. It threatened to wash over him so he shielded his eyes, covering his face with his forearms. The golden, blinding light enveloped him, pushing out the illusion of the dark.

Warmth crept into his hands, crawling up his arms and settling within his core as his feet touched something solid. Loki regained his balance quickly and stood alert, blinking until his vision returned.

The glow finally faded, and he realized he was in Asgard, an image of it, standing on a pathway in his mother's favorite garden. Memories from his childhood he thought were buried came rushing back into his head, longing filling his heart.

"Welcome to the Gates of Valhalla," A soft voice made Loki turn slowly, as if he feared a sudden movement would make it all vanish. He stood face to face with the Queen of Asgard. She was wearing the same, storm gray and royal blue robes he had seen her with last, in his cell, as an illusion years ago. It almost hurt just to look.

"Mother," Loki whispered, like a timid child, "Why... Why am I here? Surely Valhalla... is not for someone like me."

Frigga smiled fondly, the gesture warming Loki's heart even more than the ambience around him. "My son, I am so proud of you. It is no accident you are here, drawn in by the Norns to these gates. I have waited for you to come, though I wish you did not arrive so soon after Odin and I."

Loki just shook his head solemnly, "You're mistaken, dear mother. The things I've done, what I've caused, both what you know of and what you don't, they do not permit me to enter this place. I should be in Hel with... with my sister, unfortunate as it sounds."

"Oh, Loki," She cupped his face gently, making him look her in the face, sadness brimming in her deep blue eyes. "I had said before, you were always so perceptive of everyone but yourself. You've changed much, but this remains the same." He blinked, trying to make sense of what she said.

After a pause, Frigga continued, "You have done more than enough to redeem yourself, my love. You do not realize it, but you have truly earned your place in these golden halls with us. Come with me, please. Your fight is over and you will be welcomed home."

Loki exhaled shakily and pulled away. "I'm sorry. I can't," He said, "I have unfinished business with the living."

He reached out, uncertain, before lightly taking her hands in his. "I do not belong there, anyway. I killed you, Odin, Heimdall, and so many others. They wouldn't want me there no matter what I had done to fix the past."

 _Your actions make you a monster, not your heritage,_ he reminded himself.

The queen chuckled, "You think too harshly, Loki. They do not harbor their deaths against you, nor do I blame you for my death in battle. You must know that." 

Loki's breath hitched, catching on itself. "What?" Immediately, he looked down, shame and guilt clouding his features, _I told that monster where to go, and you died because I wasn't there for you. I cursed Odin and sent him to Midgard, where he died and that unleashed Hela. I started Ragnarok, destroyed Asgard- I brought Thanos to the ship and he slaughtered our refugees and killed Heimdall because of the Tesseract,_  His mind screamed, "But I-"

"You are not responsible for my death, nor Odin's or Heimdall's." Frigga cut him off firmly, hardly leaving any room for an argument. He didn't believe it but he knew better than to go against the steadfast woman.

"It is true, my prince." A voice to Loki's left made him jump. The fallen gatekeeper stood beside him, his battle-worn armor replaced with leathers and cloth. "Your mother is right." 

"I'm sorry," Loki burted out to Heimdall. "I couldn't save you, I'm sorry."

The Asgardian gave a consoling smile, "My friend, there was nothing any of us could have done. Thanos is a powerful foe and I take pride in my final moments. You should too. I can see past the walls of Valhalla, it seems. You died a true warriors death, Loki."

Heimdall put a hand on his shoulder in reassurance, remembering the times before Loki's fall. "If you chose to stay, nobody would question your place. You were their king." _Perhaps, better than Odin in the recent years,_ He thought.

Loki scoffed at that, his mind betraying him, whispering about his deceits and lies on the throne. "You know I can't Heimdall, not when Thor and the Valkyrie are still alive. You see them, don't you?"

The gatekeeper nodded. "Yes, they are alive, with the few people Asgard has left. I understand your cause, and I wish you the best of luck, Loki of Asgard." He bowed his head to both royals in farewell and faded into patches light, the shining particles drifting away like those in an Asgardian funeral.

Loki held his breath for a moment before turning to Frigga. "Mother, I'm so sorry, for everything. I want to be forgiven and I want to stay, but I must go back."

She smiled and nodded forlornly. "A part of me begs for you to stay. The other wants you to leave and not return here again for many years. I may not understand your plan or intentions, but I do know I love you. You are forever and always forgiven, and I am so proud of you, Loki. Never forget that, my child."

He fought back tears at her words, his eyes betraying him as droplets trickled down his pale cheeks. Loki moved forward and took her in a hug, Frigga returning it immedately, pulling him closer and wrapping her arms around him. He sniffed, letting his silent tears fall as he rested his head against her shoulder.

Loki was taller, but he slumped over, leaning into his mother. She didn't complain, she just held him, making him feel safe and okay and _loved_. "It's alright, I've got you, Loki. I'm here, I'm here," Frigga promised.

They held on to each other, communicating without words as Loki's shoulders trembled from the suppressed sobs. _I'm sorry_ and _thank you_ , were repeated in his head over and over as he lost his composure from the pent up emotions. Frigga rubbed circles into his back as he regained himself, sniffing and pulling away.

"I have to go," He said softly, although all he wanted to do was to stay and bury his nose into her robes, breathing in the scent of home. Loki reached out one last time, drawing her to his chest and resting his chin on her head protectively. "One day, perhaps, I can return here to you," Loki murmured.

"I will be here waiting. I love you, Loki. You and Thor will always be in my heart, I will be watching over you both. Your brother needs you, just as you need him. Now go, Loki. I have faith in you."

"Thank you, mother. I-" His world was pulled away. _Love you._

The words died on Loki's tounge as he was thrown back into the void, nothingness swirling around him. _I'll say it, one day,_ He promised himself.

His surroundings twisted, billowing clouds of ash and soot swamping his vision. A gust of heat ran through his body as flames and embers dotted the atmosphere. Loki coughed at the sudden aridity. 

"No," Dread in his stomach dropped like a stone as he saw his allegedly-dead sister. Hela stood tall, alive and menacing  before him.

"Hello, brother." Hela hissed, standing in clouds of black and green smoke. The dark tendrils clawed at the very air around her. "I didn't think you had the guts to do it. Guess I was wrong about you, Frost Giant."

Loki’s muscles tensed as he tightened his stance, desperately wishing for a dagger or weapon. The sorcerer reached for his magic, feeling nothing but cold.

"People do tend to make that mistake a lot,” He narrowed his eyes. “How are you even alive? We quite literally caused Ragnarok."

She scoffed, "You think dropping a realm on me would kill the goddess of death?" 

"You tell me," Loki challenged, confidence building as she didn't attempt to impale him yet. 

Hela manifested her helmet, the intricate spikes casting a shadow over his face and the ashes. It did nothing but intimidate him in the slightest. A scare tactic, Loki knew, his own strategies sometimes relying on visual bluffs.

"I cannot die," She growled, curling her fists. "Instead I remain trapped in my own realm now, forever to serve a punishment as I _watch over_ the dead." Hela gestured around her, the blazing skies melting into gray shadows and glimpses of souls. "I would have rather just died to be left in peace. At least when I was imprisoned by Odin I didn’t have to deal with this endless,” Hela crossed her arms, “ _Whining_.”

"Then why bring me here? To exact revenge on me for spoiling your plan of mass conquest?" Loki murmured, understanding the feeling of longing for the sweet escape in death. 

That earned him an eyeroll. "Thanos, the Mad Titan,” The goddess stated simply.

Loki stiffened, "What of him?" He covered his grimace with mock-confusion.

"He plans to kill half the population, of each and every species. A waste of time and effort, honestly," She snorted, "Not even for rulership or conquering, but for the absurd reason of a balancing act," Hela spat out, shaking her head. "I don't need that much work here, not all at once. I may be a queen but I'm not carefree. I have a new kingdom to run." 

Loki nodded, still on edge. "You didn't answer my question," He pointed out.

"You're dead. Or very close to it. You probably won't even make it back. Not without my help, of course."

"I'm not looking to go back to that reality just yet. I have my own plan, sister. The only thing stopping me is you at the moment."

"I'll let your soul go if you agree to one thing," Hela declared, holding out her hands.

"And what's that?" Loki inquired, stepping forward.

"With Odin, myself, and a few other powerful beings dead or incapacitated," Hela ground out the last part, "Thanos in possesion of the Infinity Stones practically dooms all the nine realms. It's impossible for any of you to stop him."

"I do remember you saying something along the lines of,  _you have no idea what's possible_. Do you truly wish to make the same mistake of underestimating me once again?" The silvertounge asked.

"Trust me, dear sister, I'll take care of the issue for you. You can thank me when I die, by letting me go to Valhalla. Do we have a deal?"

"You sound like Odin and his diplomats," Hela muttered, but nodded grudgingly. "I accept. Do try not to fail, or else you will end up in Hel, with me as your queen." 

 “Sounds fair to me. But, before I go, I must ask,” He took a breath before continuing, “Why did Odin send you away? Truly, we had no idea you existed before now.” 

Hurt flickered in Hela’s eyes for a brief moment, quickly followed by irritation. “Of course he wouldn’t have told you, he didn’t want you two to turn out the same. And he was ashamed.”

He snickered, “Well, we may be more similar than Odin would have liked. I am a villain in my own sense.”

Hela raised an eyebrow. “You? The diplomat? Do go on, you’ve caught my interest.” 

The god obliged, proceeding to recite the story of his descent into madness. He paused when Hela held up a hand. 

“Odin and I committed many acts during Asgard’s conquest, most far worse than that. Why were you punished for such things? Taking the power you rightfully had and using it against those beneath you, is that not honorable in Dad’s terms?” 

“Not for me,” Loki huffed. “Thor was always the golden son, always perfect and never wrong. With him around Odin would punish me quite unreasonably.”

He sighed. “Our father sucked at parenting. It wasn’t any of us, it was him, the temperamental fool,” The god laughed, devoid of humor. 

“Agreed,” She hummed, “It was a shame we met on opposing sides, brother. We would have made a formidable team.”

“I have to admit, you’re right. I’m no witch, but if Odin wasn’t our father things would be very different.” They shared a knowing smirk.

”Maybe my bloodlust would have calmed if he hadn’t opposed me at every turn,” Hela admitted, looking at her hands. Loki noticed her helmet had dissipated some time ago, smooth black hair replacing it.

”Maybe, maybe not. We all do things we regret,” Loki mused. “We don’t have to be the bad guys. Truthfully there are no good or bad sides.

“Just an ‘us’ and ‘them’. We all have reasons, motivations, justifications, and mistakes.” He put a hand to his head, frowning. “But we have to change, too. That’s what life is all about.”

“And in your case, death,” He added after and awkward pause.

“I just wanted Asgard to reclaim its former glory. I was betrayed and locked away and forgotten. I was angry.” 

“I know. I can relate in a way. Odin shouldn’t have caged you like.. Like an animal. People see us as monsters. But I’ve learned we can prove we‘re more than that...” He trailed off. 

”Do you really believe that?” 

“I have to.” 

 

* * *

  

He gasped as he regained consciousness, frosty wind filling his lungs. Loki’s struggled to open his eyes, the cold  useless to numb the damage.

His entire throat ached, slowly throbbing with static pain. It was nothing though, compared to when he tried to sit up.

Agony spiked in his neck, shooting down his spine with a white hot pain. A muffled whimper escaped him, dragging across his windpipe like sandpaper. 

Loki diverted every drop of energy he had left into healing magic. The glamour of his Asgardian skin fell away. 

The ebb of cold faded, Loki sluggishly realizing his natural skin was to credit. Soft snow fell around his limp body, the blanket underneath him beginning to rise.

Loki curled his fingers into the snow gently, just to remind himself he was still alive. 

 _This must be my very own pocket dimension, then. It must have worked._ His mind caught up. _Why can’t I remember? It doesn’t matter. I’ll remember soon._  

Reluctantly, Loki took a shallow breath. Then another, then another. He continued until breathing no longer hurt like shards of glass were passing through his mouth instead of air. 

Finally, he opened his blood-red eyes to stare up into the cloudy gray sky. As Loki adjusted to his unusual new retinas, he focused on healing.

He paid no mind to the external injuries, just fixing his internal damage. Finished mending the snapped bone and crushed windpipe, Loki was finally able to stand up straight. 

The frost giant inhaled shakily, adjusting to the dull aches and brusing of his body. He scanned his new world, relieved to see the Casket of Ancient Winters surrounded by a circular feild of Tesseract Essence. 

Loki immediately formed a cane of ice, relishing in the hum of power that trickled through him as he used his Jotun ability. Leaning against the staff to alleviate some of his weight, Loki made his way towards the Casket. 

He stopped directly in front of the pedestal, reaching out with careful hands. Slight tremors ran through his fingers as he dipped his hands into the leftover energy from the Space Stone. 

The cerulean waves of the substance ran along the ridges of the casket. Loki worked with haste to fuse the two and solidify his dimension. 

When the world finally felt stable enough wedged in its pocket of space, Loki drew his hands away, bringing the remaining essence with him.

He had created a link with the Space Stone, which would be connecting to the other stones and tied into the Infinity Gauntlet.

Loki searched for the bond, encouraged to see his spellwork held strongly. His next enchantment should bring all those killed by the gauntlet to this place.

”Speaking of this place,” Loki looked around, observing the wide platform atop a low peak. “The fragile mortals wouldn’t like this chill.” 

He sighed, “I actually enjoy this temperature.” 

However Loki still reached out towards the Casket, albeit rather begrudgingly, and began to modify the atmosphere to something more survivable for humans. 

He just hoped his body wouldn’t give out before he finished.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> probably not the most understandable chapters, so if anyone is confused or needs a recap let me know in the comments. i'd be more than happy to answer any questions about this long and confusing chapter.
> 
> authors note- i love hela she was so cool in ragnarok and i didnt want to completely abandon her character in well,, hell so heres a little cameo for her in this chapter :p
> 
> as always thank you for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The things they lost in the fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTE i posted this chapter without doing my final checks because it would’ve taken too long so any mistakes are my own and feel free to point them out!
> 
> MAJOR spoilers in this chaptor uhh if you didn’t see IW yet I’m not sure why you’re here but this chapter takes some stuff directly out of the movie so... be warned

Steve was always the one to shoulder the most responsibility. The one to never give up hope, never stop fighting until everyone was safe. 

The man that kneeled before Thor was a shell of who he remembered. Exhaustion, emotional and physical, weighed on his slumped shoulders.

”Oh God,” Steve murmured, his face a mix of despair and confusion. “What did he do, where are they-“

”Steve,” The widow said softly, placing a steadying hand on his shoulder. 

“We lost.” Was the deadpanned reply. 

Thor looked away, another voice drawing his attention. “Has anyone seen Sam? Did anyone hear from him before...” 

The Colonel, James Rhodes, (if he remembered) his armor bent and dirty, scanned the group. “We- I’m going to make some calls, see who’s left. Search for survivors,” He said, the low hum of his thrusters filling the silence for a brief moment as he took off. 

Natasha crouched besides Steve, who was running his fingers through the dust on the ground. “I won’t leave him again,” Was all Thor caught.

”Hey Thor, can you, uh, can you help me out?” 

“Of course my friend,” He responded instantly, turning away from his bloody axe on the ground. The god hurried towards Bruce, helping him down from the battered Hulkbuster armor. 

“Thanks,” Bruce gave him a sad smile. Thor nodded mutely, his gaze turned back to the scene. 

“No no no,” Rocket was muttering, his paws hovering inches above the remains of his teen.

”Go help him, I got Steve and Nat,” Bruce said quietly. Thor flashed him a grateful look and slowly walked over.

Rocket’s muzzle was buried in his forearm, muffled crying making the god’s heart ache. “Rabbit, I’m sorry.”

”It wasn’t you. It was him. _He_ did this to Groot,” He growled, shaking his tears away. “Once I get back to the rest of the crew I’ll tear his friggin’ eyes out.” 

“We will track down Thanos. We will defeat him and avenge those we’ve lost. I swear he won’t get away with this,” Thor rambled, needing to distract himself.

He needed to fill his thoughts with revenge, with justice, until the fight was over. He couldn’t grieve until then. 

“Can your magic axe still boom us to other places?” 

“Indeed, Stormbreaker can access the Bifrost,” _Even without the direction of Heimdall,_ he thought _._

“Guess it was worth nearly being burnt to a crisp for.I’m gonna track the ship. They can’t be at Knowhere anymore. How soon can we leave?” Rocket grumbled. 

“As soon as you find them. I’ll be back in a minute,” Thor promised. 

The Asgardian crossed the clearing and knelt beside the empty husk of the Vision. The dull gray of his unseeing eyes bore into Thor’s soul. 

Thor drew a gentle hand over his eyes, careful to avoid the gaping hole in his forehead. He let out a heavy sigh, turning away from the morbid sight. 

Steve staggered to his feet, his friend’s gun clutched in his hand. “Captain,” Thor began, hesitating as Steve snapped out of his trance and focused his eyes.

”Yeah, Thor?” 

“I’m taking my friend to find the rest of his crew. They are allies, enemies of Thanos. We need to rally all of our forces to track him down.”

The soldier nodded, “Okay. Yeah, you’re right. It’s not... it’s not over yet.” He dropped his gaze back to the floor, back to the place where his friend fell. Natasha rubbed his arm reassuringly as she passed, going over to Bruce. 

”...What was his name?”

”Bucky,” Steve choked out, shaking hands grasping the gun tighter. His eyes hardened after a moment. “His name was Bucky,” Steve repeated firmly, determination swirling behind fatigue from battle. 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Thanks. Where have you been, you and Bruce?” 

“It’s quite a story,” He sighed. Rocket began to wave at him. “I have to go,” Thor said apologetically. “When we return, I can explain. I’ve missed a lot too, it would be good to catch up.” 

“Right. Good luck, then.” 

Thor nodded in thanks and returned to Rocket. The rabbit paced along the branch, a sour expression on his snout.

”They’re on Titan. Why the hell would they be there? Can you even go that far?” 

He nodded as Stormbreaker returned to his hand. “Let’s go.” He dipped his shoulder slightly for the creature to scramble up.

Thor pointed his axe and flew away from the treeline, aware of the blast radius that came with the Bifrost.

Wind rushed in his ears while Rocket clung to his armor, the two looking on at the torn up battlefield. The piles of corpses of the mindless beasts that attacked seemed never-ending. Only the occasional body of a Wakandan soldier was torn to shreds by the crazed animals lay strewn about the field.

The few who survived the snap were slowly regrouping under the guidance of who seemed to be a leader, and a fierce general dressed in red. Thor remembered her grief-stricken face as she left the clearing soon after Rhodey. He dully wondered if he’d even known the person she lost.

The god spotted an empty space near the river. Not bothering to even land, Thor raised Stormbreaker and let out a roar, summoning the power of the Bifrost.

Familiar multicolored light enveloped the duo as the vortex swirled around them. Briefly, Thor heard a crash of thunder and the harsh splash of the water below before they were whisked away, traveling towards the unknown. 

* * *

 

Steve could only stare at the ground where Bucky had fallen right in front of him. Turned to ash by someone he couldn’t stop. The gun Bucky was holding was abandoned on the forest floor. Next to the pile of dust.

 _His_ dust. Steve barely paid any attention to Natasha’s movements, until she was kneeling next to him, pressing her body into his. He knew they both needed the comfort, so he leaned into the touch, taking breaths to steady himself. 

He reached out towards the dust, the soft particles slipping through his fingers no matter how hard he tried to hold on to them. “I can’t leave him here, I won’t leave him again.” Steve mumbled, trying to gather what was left.

”Okay,” Natasha replied quietly, reaching into one of her hidden compartments of her suit to pull out a bandage. She wordlessly helped her friend wrap Bucky’s remains in the cloth, watching in sorrow as he sifted through the substance with shaky hands, ridding it of any caught up twigs and underbrush. 

Tears pooled at the edges of Steve’s vision. He couldn’t save Bucky again. He couldn’t save Vision or Wanda or T’Challa or Sam or- 

“Steady Cap,” Natasha held his opposite shoulder, comforting him the best way she knew how. 

“Thanks Nat,” His voice cracked, silent tears rolling down dirty cheeks. Streams crossed his skin and left trails, which he wiped away roughly. “Are you okay?” Steve questioned.

”No, are you?” The assassin replied.

”I have to be, for everyone.”

”No, don’t do this to yourself. Give yourself time to process and grieve, but do not do that thing you do where you take all the blame and isolate yourself so the team doesn’t see your grief. You’re not weak, but you don’t need to be strong for everyone all the time, okay?” 

“Okay, but it’s hard, I feel like I have to, nobody else should,” He admits, reaching out to take Bucky’s gun as well.

”None of us deserve this, Cap. But we all need to deal with it, you can’t take everyone’s loss from them and make yours worse. It’s not your fault they died. It’s no one’s fault but Thanos. He’s to blame and we’ll take him down _together_.”

”Okay, thank you. Go see Bruce, you need each other right now,” Steve murmured.

Natasha nodded and got up in a quick motion, light on her feet at she almost hesitantly approached her former lover.

Steve stood up on unsteady feet, holding Bucky’s gun and dust close to his chest. His thoughts wandered back to Tony.

Was he even alive? Missing alone in space? They might have won if Tony had fought with them. Could they have?

When the phone first rang, Steve’s chest constricted with a strange nervousness. What would Tony say after two years?

”Stark?” He had answered, but the anxious voice of the thought-to-be-dead Bruce Banner greeted him.

A quick explaination of the situation drew Steve’s thoughts away, always focusing on the problem at hand.

Thor’s “Captain?” drew him out of his thoughts, and Steve listened absentmindedly. 

After the god had left, bringing the talking raccoon with him, Steve assessed the shambles of his team. 

Natasha and Bruce had found a broken tree to sit on, conversing in hushed voices. Steve knew the scientist was having a hard time sharing where he had been, even with Natasha.

Rhodey limped over to them, shedding his War Machine armor. “Shuri, the kid,” He said regretfully, “She’s taking up charge of Wakanda. T’Challa and their mother died in... in the snap... So she’s the only royal left.”

”The Queen said Wakanda will do whatever it can to aid us in tracking down Thanos. But they need time. We’re offered a place to regroup,” Rhodey explained. 

“That’s generous of her. Is she okay?” Steve asked. He had spoken to Bucky over video calls whenever the motels had wifi a couple times. His friend always spoke highly of the bright teen, grateful for her help and friendship. Shuri didn’t deserve that great of a burden.

”She lost her brother and mother, and more than half her people. Okoye is there for her though,” Rhodey replied, slumping to the ground massaging his legs with a sore expression.

”And Sam?” 

“Gone,” Rhodey murmured, dropping his gaze. 

“Is the government intact? Who else is left?” Steve asked.

”I can’t get a hold of Fury. The ambassador blocked my number after you showed up.” 

“I doubt he’d be much help anyway,” Steve scoffed. “Just another pointless fight. I’m getting kinda sick of those.” 

“Yeah,” Rhodey agreed. “I tried to get a hold of Tony and Pepper. The line was dead.” 

Steve nodded solemnly. Tony still could be in space with that wizard Bruce mentioned.

”I’m not sure where Thor went, but we need to wait for him here. He’s bringing back some others,” Steve started off, taking in the three in front of him.

”I think we all need a break after that.”

”All we can do is wait. It’s not giving up, we need to all rest and regroup,” Steve assured them. 

They won’t give up. 

* * *

 

 Guilt. Hopelessness. Fear. Anguish. Loss. 

Tony Stark pressed his hand to his face, blood and dust spattered along his palm. 

Peter. He was only a kid. He was only here because of him.

Tony was willing to die. Put his life on the line. Peter didn’t. He didn’t deserve to die in Tony’s place.

 _Why_ did Strange do that? Why did he sacrifice _everything_ for _him_? Why did he have to live instead of everyone else? 

What was he going to tell Peter’s Aunt? He let the kid die? He brought him to space to battle a mad titan?

”What did he do?” Tony asked the blue woman lowly.

”He must have gotten the last stone on Terra. Then he snapped and half of the universe died.” She answered. Tony looked up and ran his eyes down her frame. 

Her natural skin appeared to be navy with a streak of indigo on her face. Silver pieces of metal were embedded into her flesh and skull, making her half machine. Her eyes were pitch black, but they reflected Tony’s grief.

”Who did you lose,” Tony muttered, standing up with his fists clenched.

”My family,” She said hoarsely, turning away.

”The ship you crashed into Thanos, would it still work? I need to get back to Earth.” He finally remembered her name. “Nebula, does it work?” Tony repeated harshly.

”Not anymore,” Nebula ground out, hands curling around her weapon as a clear warning. Tony couldn’t summon up any fear at her threat. 

“I need to get back,” Tony grumbled frantically. “Avenge them, all of them. There are still people that can fight,” He said.

“I have nothing left to fight for,” Nebula said robotically. “There’s no hope of reversing any of it.” 

”It doesn’t matter if you feel like you don’t have anything to fight for, you still need to do it!” Tony snapped. “Thanos called you his daughter. Now you have to help clean up his mess!” 

“I just said there’s nothing that can be done! It can’t be reversed and we can’t kill him- Believe me, I’ve tried. There’s no hope to escape this shitty planet let alone get revenge.” 

A boom suddenly erupted in the decimated planet. They tilted their heads up, confused.

”You were saying, Terminator?” He huffed, watching as the blast that signalled the arrival of a certain Norse god touched down among the rubble. 

Tony heard Thor was alive, but he didn’t think the god would be able to find him in space. Silver lining, he supposed. 

To his surprise, Thor wasn’t alone. On his shoulder was... was that a raccoon?

”Nebula!” It barked, jumping down from its perch and running over on two legs. “Where are they?” 

“They’re all gone, Rocket,” Nebula responded dully.

The animal snarled and leapt at her with nothing but teeth and claws. As Nebula dealed with the creature’s outburst, Thor approached him.

”Stark,” He greeted, almost awkwardly.

”Hey there Thor. Long time, nice hair,” Tony replied, the lack of his normal attitude not going unnoticed. “Can you bring us back to Earth?”

“Indeed. Did the Guardians... turn to dust as well?” The god had a heavy look to his eyes. Tony wondered if he knew them well. 

”Yeah, and a wizard that goes by the name Strange and... and a kid.” _The kid I was supposed to protect, he was only a kid-_ He took a few seconds to struggle through a deep breath, heart pounding in his ears.

“The Sorcerer Strange?” Thor asked suddenly, dragging his thoughts away from Peter.

”Yeah, you buds?”

”I met him and we became allies a short time ago, we needed him,” The thunderer sighed.

“Bummer. Did you get a new thingy?” He gestured to the unfamiliar weapon Thor was weilding.

”Oh! Yes well, my evil sister who I had no idea existed came back and tried to conquer all the realms, but Loki and I stopped her along with a few others, but my hammer got broken in the process. I forged a new weapon, Stormbreaker,” Thor explained in a rush. A shadow crossed his face when he realized what he said.

“Loki? He’s alive?” Tony demanded, recalling Bruce saying how Thanos had sent the god in the New York invasion. 

“Not anymore,” Thor said darkly. He shot a glance over to Tony. “But we still have allies. The others are back on Earth.” 

“Is Steve there?” Tony asked immediately, whipping his head around to face him. “And Bruce and the others, of course?” He added a moment later.

“Yes, but there were many casualties... I do not know many of the new temanates but I’ve gathered the losses are heavy,” Thor replied sullenly. “I also seem to be missing something between the Avengers.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Yeah you missed a lot pal. It happens when you go off the radar for a few years. Can we go now?” He questioned. Tony’s heart rate felt like it was impossibly climbing every minute he spent waiting to return. 

“Rocket, we’re going back to-“

”Fine! Let’s go then! Leave her here,” He snapped, waving a paw at Nebula, who was sporting a nasty clawmark on her face. 

“No, you’re coming with,” Tony ordered, gesturing for Thor to follow him.

”You’re Thanos’ daughter, you could have intel,” He continued, and Nebula rolled her eyes. Which was hard, considering she didn't have any pupils. 

“I won’t leave you here,” Thor spoke, rather softly for his outward appearance, “But you don’t have to stay on Earth. I can drop you off someplace, if that’s what you want. But would your sister really want you to give up?”

‘Since when did Thor become so mature and soft spoken?’ Tony thought. 

Nebula socked him in the jaw, making Thor stumble back a couple steps. Tony observed a glint in his eye, maybe nostalgic? 

“Don’t mention her again,” Nebula growled, shaking her wrist from the sudden impact. 

They stood in tense silence for a moment before the animal piped up. “Well let’s get going then. Galaxy ain't gonna avenge itself.” 

Thor smiled. It wasn’t one of his bright, glowing smiles that reached his eyes. But it was a smile nonetheless, giving them a spark of determination. 

“Back to Earth,” The god said, raising his new axe and sending them off into the stars. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewatched this movie twice in the process of bringing you this chapter so I hope my pain was worth it
> 
> Sorry its so freaking late by the way,, life happens


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> part two of the last chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this is really bad but,, to commemorate the release of infinity war on netflix. 
> 
> also happy holidays nerds.

From the outside, the Bifrost was always eyecatching and bright, announcing its presence with a loud roar. From the inside, Tony decided, it was worse. His head hurt with the array of colors rushing past, neon lights and whooshing air overwhelming his tired senses. 

After seconds that seemed like hours, the blast ended and above them was a cloudless, moonlit sky. The group stood in an abandoned battlefield, a river trickling behind them and trees ahead of them. A dim orange glow indicated a small fire was burning steadily within the forest. 

“This is Terra?” Nebula scoffed.

”We call it Earth. There are nicer places than this,” Tony defended halfheartedly. ”Where are we, Thor?” 

“I’m not sure. It was light when I left. Time works differently in space,” He explained. ”The rest must have camped out in the forest. I’m going to talk with the Captain to figure out our next move. You should come too.” Thor began to walk away, eyeing the battlefield as he went. 

“Hm, yeah uh maybe later buddy. Take me to whoever is in charge of this place,” The man huffed.

”That would be me,” A new voice interrupted sharply. Tony found the accent familiar as he turned to face a hologram of a young woman in red armor.

”Who the hell are you? Kid Princess-“

”Shuri, heir of Wakanda,” She cut him off before he could guess. Not many people had the skill to match Tony in boldness of words.

”Oh, so this is Wakanda. I expected more tech, but this is pretty... rugged?”

”That’s because a battle was just fought here hours ago,” Shuri grumbled. She took a breath and regained her posture. “We all need to work together now. The others are camping out in the forest for the night. After the Accords, you have a lot to talk about with... with the survivors. Also, blue lady, I like your style. Shuri out.” 

The hologram dissapated into the night. Tony ran a hand through his tangled hair, wincing as he moved too quickly and the wound on his side stung.

”Let’s go then, wise guy. It’s only the end of the world,” Rocket snapped. He went after Thor with Nebula behind him, shrugging wordlessly. 

Tony sighed and gulped in a lungfull of air. “Fine. Right. Years, no contact. Boom, Avengers reuinion. Fun times.” Grumbing, he made his way towards the rest of the heroes.

 

* * *

 

Bruce was the first one to spot their favorite god returning from outer space. “Thor’s back,” He announced, standing up to greet him.

“I found Stark,” Thor explained, “They lost a few others, only two came back.” 

Steve looked up from tending the fire. “Tony’s here?”

”Yeah I am, long time no see Rogers.” 

A heavy silence fell upon the clearing, the only sound being the low crackle of the fire. 

“You too,” Steve quietly returned to Tony, who had just arrived with the raccoon from before and a blue woman. 

The captain scrubbed his hands over his face and turned away, avoiding even glancing at Tony. “I’ll get more wood.”

Thor and Bruce exchanged awkward glances. ‘Go with him,’ the scientist mouthed.

”I’ll come with you,” Thor piped up, giving Bruce a quick nod. He gave a shy thumbs up in response. 

Looking only slightly crestfallen, the engineer uttered a simple “sure pal” before turning his back. “Where- Rhodey!” 

He practically grabbed his friend and pulled him in for a tight hug. “Woah hey- I’m okay, I’m okay Tony,” Rhodey assured him. He felt the rough patch on his side and frowned at Tony’s injury. “What the hell happened?” 

“Long story. I’m glad you’re here, Rhodes.”

”Yeah, you too man. But- but there’s something else...” The colonel trailed off. 

“Wait what do you mean something else?” Tony’s voice wobbled, making Bruce wince.

”Tony I’m sorry,” Bruce said softly.

”Banner, Rhodey, what happened,” Tony demanded. 

“It’s... It’s Pepper. She- she’s gone.”

 

* * *

“I sense things to be a bit tense between everyone these days,” Thor mused, eyeing the pile of wood Steve had collected.

”Yeah, Thor. Things changed a lot. Nat caught Bruce up before she went to help Shuri. I’m just realizing you weren't there for that debriefing,” Steve said apologetically.

”That’s alright. I did leave Earth for a few years. It’s bound to change.” 

“Well, basically,” Steve gathered a couple thick twigs in his arms, “Legal disputes happened because of the Avengers, we disagreed, split off into two sides, and fought. After I escaped... I haven’t seen Tony since, until now.” 

“What about your friend from before?” Thor asked softly.

Steve snapped the branches in half. “Bucky. He was uh, brainwashed into doing terrible things. I tried to tell people it wasn’t his fault but... Tony was too angry. It was my fault, I should have told him the truth.”

Thor pondered this for a minute. “Captain, could I offer a few words of advice?”

“Of course.”

“Sometimes, when family fights, both sides can be wrong. Both can be right in their own way, too. I know you feel guilty, Stark probably feels the same. You should talk, before the final fight. Earth needs its best defenders, and you and Stark together are the best chance this world has,” He took a deep breath. ”Loki. Thanos killed him right in front of me,” He confessed.

Thor wiped his eyes and looked up. Steve put down the things in his hands and walked over. “I’m sorry, Thor.” He wasn’t questioning Loki’s resurrection, it had happened before. Steve was honestly more surprised at Thor’s openess, his change in demeanor. He must have changed too, while he was gone. Thor offered his support, so he’d do the same. “I know you loved him.”

“Don’t be sorry. Point is, the last thing he and I ever did was fight. I thought he had betrayed me. My last words were horrible to him. He gave his life trying to defend the universe. We were both wrong, but we never got the chance to reconcile before... before I lost him. I advise you to not make the same mistake with Stark. Brothers shouldn't risk their lives in battle if there are still things left unresolved.”

“Thank you, Thor. That’s actually... really good advice. I’m sorry about Loki, by the way,” Steve put a hand on his shoulder.

”I appreciate that, Captain. I know you only knew a crazed, unusual side of my brother, but he was not like that at all. In fact, he never had any motive for the New York invasion...”

Steve’s head snapped up. “Bruce told me Thanos was the one to send Loki. Do you think he was the one controlling him?” 

Thor blinked at their epiphany together. “Now that you’ve said it... It makes sense. That’s why... That’s why he- Does this have any relation to your brainwashed friend?” 

Steve sighed, then gave a dry laugh. “When did you get so perceptive, Thor?”

”Just recently... A lot of things have happened to me too,” The god shrugged. “Steve I’m so sorry about your friend. If I had just killed him directly instead of keeping him alive for revenge I just-”

”Thor stop. Don’t blame yourself. We- we all lost,” Steve sniffed. “It’s bad right now, worse than it’s ever been, but we’ve been down before and- and we can still avenge them.”

”You should give that pep talk to everyone else, too,” Thor joked. “Come on, let’s get back to the others. The fire will last the whole night.” He gestured to the materials they had gathered while talking.

”Yeah. It’s good to have you back, buddy.” 

“Good to be back, Captain.”

* * *

“What do you mean she’s gone?!” Tony yelled, shoving himself away from Rhodey.

”I called her over and over, she’s not answering Tony, I’m sorry-“

”No! No this cannot be happening, this is some sick joke. Well it’s not funny, guys!” He was frantic now.

”Tony please listen, we tried everything while you were in space, we wouldn’t lie about this,” Bruce tried to get through to him.

”But she can’t be gone,” Tony practically pleaded with them. ”It couldn't have taken her too.”

Bruce and Rhodey exchanged guilt-ridden glances, watching helplessly as Tony sunk to the ground and curled into himself. 

Rhodey crouched beside him, hesitantly reaching out. Tony leaned into the contact, shoulders shaking. His eyes were hollow, his skin decorated with bruises and blood.

“You look exhausted, come on. Our makeshift camp has some strewn together mats.” 

He merely grunted in response, allowing them to guide him over. Tony’s body was numbing, he could barely feel his limbs and his mind was detatched. 

“Stay with me,” Tony whispered. His gaze was haunting. Rhodey quickly agreed and settled beside him, allowing his friend to collapse into his side, breathing ragged.

”Thank you,” Bruce murmured sadly. Rhodey gave a sad smile in response, feeling Tony go limp. 

Once he made sure Tony’s breathing was beginning to even out, the scientist let the tension from his shoulders drain. He turned to face the newcomers.

”We haven’t met,” He said quietly.

”Nebula. The raccoon over there is Rocket,” The blue woman muttered.

Rocket growled in response but Bruce could see the fight drained from him as he slumped against a fallen branch.

Nebula’s pitch black eyes glittered in the light of the fire. He swallowed, thoroughly intimidated. “Nice to meet you,” Bruce forced out awkwardly. She didn't respond.

“Banner,” Thor’s call drew his attention away.

The god was finishing off the pile of wood, with Steve throwing the rest in the crackling fire. He met them halfway and leaned against the toppled tree, sitting down on soft grass.

They lowered down next to him, Thor adding his axe to the pile of weapons. Bruce could make out Steve’s new shield in the pile.

”How much do you remember of Loki?” Thor asked quietly.

”Well, uh, not much from when I was hulk. Sorry Thor. What’s it about?”

”We think Thanos might have been controlling Loki back in New York,” Thor admits.

”Oh, could that help with taking him down now?” Bruce pondered.

”No,” Steve huffed, “But all the more reason to focus on precaution. Thanos could control any of us now, especially with all the stones.” 

“I guess. But can we worry about that later? Half of them are already asleep and not gonna lie,” Bruce said between a yawn, “I feel like passing out.”

“Yeah, we all need rest. I’ll lead everyone back to the palace tomorrow, hopefully some of the tech is up and running so we don’t need to trek all the way back,” Steve mused.

”Sounds good,” Bruce smiled, realizing how much he missed the sense of calm the Captain provided him. “Night.”

Thor watched tiredly as Bruce and eventually Steve fell into a dead sleep, worn out from the recent battle. 

He leaned back against the tree, eyes trained on the dancing flames of the campfire. Thor savored the warmth from it, remembering the harsh vaccum of space with a shudder. 

Still, with all of the day’s fights weighing on him, Thor was still wide awake. His mind was racing, the faces of the dead too prominent for him to even hope for a dreamless sleep. 

So, he stayed awake to watch over the camp, the only light in his blue and golden eyes a  reflection of the fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is lowkey really bad im sorry any spelling mistakes are mine
> 
> if it sounds rushed... the whole chapter was :,)

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! any comments or questions, let me know! i love feedback :)


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